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CLOSING CYCLES by Paolo Coelho

To A Loving Sister. Mean Friend. And a Socialite Biatch!
MS. ANNA FRANCESCA F. MALOTO
XoXo Gossip Girl





One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters -- whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished. Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents' house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship ended all of a sudden? You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won't take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your sister, everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill. None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot for ever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back. Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away. That is why it is so important (however painful it maybe!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home. Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts and getting rid of certain memories also means making some room for other memories to take their place. Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else. Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the ideal moment. Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person. Nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important. Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

8 comments:

NINA at: January 31, 2008 at 5:16 AM said...

wow...i feel like i died...hahaha! and my dearests, it's Anna Francesca :)

but thank you thank you thank you. i'll be missing you guys sobra. i love you all to bits!

XOXO,
Anna Francesca

NINA at: January 31, 2008 at 5:21 AM said...

AND!!! may i please have copies of those pictures? merci mon cheri! bissous!

Toni at: January 31, 2008 at 7:47 PM said...

Magnificent! I truly love the photomontage, it's tantalizing. I hope you appreciate it Butterfly! Well, I don't need to leave a goodbye message because Francesca has not died and I'll still see her. I would not even miss her because I know that she's just around Ayala Avenue in Makati City. Butterfly, I just pray that you'll be flying with colors as you enter a new world of people unlike and of course, I hope that we could have our love lives soon. Hahaha. I remember that everytime we chat on -line we're talking about our bankrupt love life. Hahaha. Always take care dear and just send me a sms whenever you feel like treating us to dinner. Lol. Love yah!!

michelle at: January 31, 2008 at 9:45 PM said...

Nina...what can i say about this girl,all I know is that she's such a sweet person and a jolly one aside from the fact that she's pretty. Well its sad that i may not see her as often as before but I'm really happy for her. And wishes her goodluck to her new found career path.I will miss her Bombay accent, the Gulimar thing hehehehe.

Luv yah,

Michelle

Anonymous at: February 1, 2008 at 1:22 AM said...

I'm gonna miss u my dearest frend...love u

jm

Anonymous at: February 3, 2008 at 11:28 PM said...

oi friend!

i remember the first time i saw you in my initial interview at work, i said to myself "wow ang ganda naman nya"


and then days pass by . . . . "wow ang bait pala nya"


take care always

TJ

1st friend at: February 5, 2008 at 10:39 PM said...

kumusta nmn ang "I just pray that you'll be flying with colors as you enter a new world of people"--> 1st honorable mention ba ito??! haha.

i'm gonna miss our chit-chat re Gossip Girl (u know u love me...), YOUR boylets (si V at si P! un na!) bamboo,nathan,ira and most of all LOCAL and HOLLYWOOD CHISMIS! hahah!

xoxo,
1st friend

Nina at: February 8, 2008 at 8:18 PM said...

TONI!!! Thank you Butterfly! My pleasure to make you and JM libre, sympre, alam mo na. Sentimiento de patatas. Haha. And ya, even tho I've said goodbye to Infocom, I didn't say goodbye to yo guys naman e. Maghintay lang tayo ng sweldo ko please, and then we have to hang out again, ok? Lemme think about whether or not I'll make libre. Love life will come in time...be patient! If not, tayo na lang? Ahaha! (Eew...) Love ya!

ATE MICHELLE, thank you thank you. I hope you find your hapiness soon. Both personal and professional sana! I have yet to see how this new job works out, let you know in a few months..malay natin. Haha. Golimar is just around the corner... :)

JM, ano ba! Text me kasi no. We're gonna meet up SOON!

TJ! Echos ka talaga. You love me, you just don't want to admit it. Hehehe. Ingat din ha. If you wanna try a career in sales for Bosch, lemme know! Haha. Besos!

1ST FRIEND AR---let us not mention unworthy asungots sa tabi-tabi. Let's forget . Ahahaha! I'm gonna buy GG dvd, meron na!!! Dito na lang tayo magpalitan ng chismis!

1ST FRIEND JENG, thank you for this space na ginawa na namin parang forum. Haha.

XOXO, Nina